I think I'll Name My Child Salmon Patty

After all, if Charlie Brown can have Peppermint Patty, why can't I have Salmon Patty?

Salmon patties are so hopelessly old-fashioned, my best hope is that the food snobs would consider them retro rather than plebeian. I must confess here that I always have a can of salmon in the pantry and when I fry up salmon patties for supper, my fussy eaters gobble them up. It's a cheap, nutritious, tasty and filling entree and I really shouldn't have to apologize for that, now should I?

I've tried a few recipes over the years, mostly from the back of the can, but I always go back to the late 80's Pillsbury Cookbook version. Pillsbury was my bridal shower cookbook, and my beaten-up, stained copy is missing both covers, but thank goodness the recipes still work.

Salmon Patties

Yield: 6 patties
1 (15 oz.) can salmon, undrained
2-4 cups fresh bread crumbs from white sandwich bread, divided
2 eggs
2 tsp. lemon juice
1 tsp. dried parsley
1/2 small onion, finely chopped
1/4 tsp. salt
1/8 tsp. pepper
canola oil for frying

1. In a bowl, place salmon. Pick through fish, pulling out skin and icky dark stuff. Mash the bones between your fingers (the bones are supposed to be good for you - all that calcium).

2. Add remaining ingredients, using about 1 1/2 to 2 cups of bread crumbs, until you have a fairly wet mixture. Pour remaining bread crumbs into a pie dish. Shape mixture into 6 medium patties, about 1 inch thick and 3 inches across. Place in bread crumbs and gently coat with crumbs on both sides.

3. Pour oil into medium skillet and heat until it comes up to frying temperature. I drop a few bread crumbs into the hot oil to see if they will sizzle.

4. Fry the patties in the oil until golden brown, about 3 or 4 minutes on the first side, and less on the second side. Drain on paper towel-lined plate.

My standby "fridge is empty and I don't want to go to the grocery store" menu is salmon patties, macaroni and cheese (blue box is acceptable in our house) and green beans (everybody knows that good Southern cooks use Allen's Seasoned Southern Style). I just hope the food snobs don't drop in on those nights.